rage & tx

[Lisa]

Looking for some help in the form of experience & hope, preferably.  My hsb has been taking peg intron & rebetrol protocol for 33 weeks and it seems like his physical symptoms (the fever and fatigue) aren't as bad but his moods and his rage in particular are huge.  He is over reacting to everything and since we have a teenager, there is PLENTY to over react to.  Unfortunately, I have to say I am not feeling completely safe with his rages.  And, I can't reason him thru anything.  Is this normal?  He has been on anti D's thru out tx, but the moodiness and rage is only worsening as the tx continues.  Other people I know said this is what happened to them as well.  I am really struggling bcuz I want all of us to be safe & I don't want to lose my marriage to this disease.  I do know he only tells his doc half truths about how bad things are since he doesn't want them to drop him from the program this close to completion, but 15 weeks is a LONG time to be stuck in this hell.  I am trying to hang on because he has said he feels like I am going to leave him because of all this "just when I need you most" and it isn't like that.  I love this man, but he certainly isn't the man I married.  Any help would be GREATLY appreciated.

[tawanda]

I am wondering....can you call his doctor and tell him whats going on? I have a prescription for xanax that I take when I feel the rage thing coming on. I think its great that you're so supportive of him, I myself am not getting alot of that from my B/F, he keeps telling me how "bytchy" I am, like THAT'S gonna help his cause! lol I say definately call his doc, and see if he can't get a mild tranqulizer to take when he's feeling like he's gonna explode. Good Luck!

[willy]

Lisa.  I'm glad that you posted.  There are many here that had to go on anti-depressants to make TX more bearable.  This is a very common side effect of TX and can be helped with anti-d's.  If you are not feeling safe....... you have a duty to you all of you to contact the physician.  It may not be obvious to the doc, but it is obvious to you.  Just as you are having trouble separating the feeling from the knowledge that "it is the drugs" your teenager will also have a similar or worse reaction to this bad behavior.  If you do some reading in the third section here you will see many posts on people that are affected with similar problems.

best,
Willy

[geo4it]

This medicine we call TX, it takes one close to death. I found myself becoming brutally honest while I was on it.  I lost all of my tact. If your hair looked stupid I would say Your hair looks like hell. I could NOT keep my anger to myself. I also got VERY paranoid. Thought everyone was an FBI agent and wanted to bust me for numerous things that normally are ridiculous, like for spitting on the side walk, having long hair, or for just having HCV. I used to think they were gonna put me in a leper colony if I did not clear. I remember my roommate cooking one day. I could smell it. It stunk. I came in the kitchen and screamed at him that he was trying to Kill me by spoiling my appetite by cooking stinky  food. He never ate at home from that day forward.

AS for as leaving your husband, maybe it would be good for him to experience some loneliness, then again, if he is like I was, he will be thinking, I’m going to quit this TX or kill myself,,, if the hcv ever makes me feel this bad.
 I went thru the TX with NO wife or girlfriend, But my roommate did step up and he took care of my mornings of whining and of me being RAGEFUL at everything that bothered me.

For me, doing TX was like being on a long walk thru the woods in the middle of a snow storm. All I wanted to do was just sit down and freeze to death, I was so tired and yet so close. . My roommate kept telling me to keep going, and I did. I made it thru 48 weeks…..

George sw

Ps I don’t think I would tell my GI Doc how bad my thinking was. I  could have simply asked my regular family doc to increase the dosage of my anti d’s. The GI may be too weary of a law suit.  

I became homicidal too, after tx. I did not clear. I  spent a night in the local nut ward cause of it. The nut house would only give me the anti d's if I stayed over night. After I got out, my family doc asked why didn’t you just ask me for more anti-d’s.  Geez, coul;d have had a V8.  . The GI may cut the TX, the MD may help. Kinda like the Lawyer who doesn’t wanna know if you are REALLY guilty.. Hee Hee Haa Haa  But really who does know.

This tx is just plain HELL. Deal with it or let someone else do it. I was screwed up for at least a year post tx and still I wonder, Am I OK YET!!.

Take extra anti d's        d**b  A**      before you drive everyone away and end up in a nut ward.

[Ikiru]

Riba rage is legendary.   I don't really know which drugs do what but I centainly was more irritable during tx than before.   What concerns me is that you feel unsafe which suggests that he is more than just snapping at people.  Perhaps, things need to be explained to him and maybe some anti-d adjustment is an order.  You might consider whether there are some adjustments possible by all concerned to avoid the rage incidents and even whether some time of temporary or partial separation is warranted.  Particularly if he has reacted with violence or has a history of that.

The reasoning thing.  Does that continue after the flare-up?  I didn't become irrational myself and was well aware that I was over reacting to situations and used that to calm myself down and walk away from situations.  And I did tx without anti-ds although I had it easier because I only had the 24 week program.

Don

[jusme+myguy]

My husband was dxed in 10/04 we are currently living with my elderly parents (had to move in a year ago due to their health) we get along exceptionally well with them and hubby is very concerned about this rage thing. he is normally as good as they come and fears this will change him or make him say something to them that could hurt their feelings ect. has anyone else been here? We could sure use some advice....

[joyce1]

Hi Lisa,
         I know what you mean by the rage and Tx my fiance is on his final 33 pills took his last shot last night. Peg-Interferon & Rebatrol Tx.
        It was hard on me too to deal with the instant rage caused from Tx, first few months were really hard and it seemed the last few months were the hardest, I had to learn to keep my mouth shut sometimes ( which for me is kinda hard) some of the things he would say or do would really hurt my feelings knowing I've been there for him thru this whole thing, I could've left but didn't cause of my love for him I had to see it thru. so many times he wanted to give up and stop the Tx I guess that's what hurt the most knowing his condition was very bad geno-type 1a 3rd stage cirrohsis of the liver.
      I had to keep telling myself it was the Tx ,(not him) doing this to him the Tx changed him kinda like Jekyll & Hyde, his memory wasn't like it was B4 Tx he wasn't like he was B4 Tx.
     I know what you're going thru I've been there and coming out the other side this week is the end of the Tx but still a few more months to go B4 it's all out of his system.
     Gotta stay strong cause he's gonna need you more than ever I had to learn to walk away to avoid arguements sometimes that wasn't easily done.
    I'll pray for you and your family I know it's rough times but there is that light at the end of the Dragon tunnel focus on that, and keep telling yourself that it's the Tx not him doing this, it's the Tx that causes the changes within him.
    His Dr. had him see a psych. cuz of his moods and the Anti-D's I never really seen much of a difference so he stopped his Anti-D's and I'm not promoting to stop them maybe he just needs to talk to his Dr. about changing whatever he's on.
  His Dr. wa so serious about his Tx and in the beginning
my man didn't know what to do where to go and who to talk to everytime he would try to call his Dr. he would always get the answering machine..that frustrated him alot and my man has a weird sense of humor most ppl don't get. Once he finally got into the Dr.'s office he had said to the nurse that if he had  had a gun inthe car he would've shot up their phone system and not really meaning it but the Dr. overheard this and right then and there took him off Tx and told him to go see a psych.
a month later he was back on the Tx. now he's at the end. and it's been NO walk in the park for either of us.
  Keep coming to this board they can give you alot of info and a shoulder to lean on I know, they've helped me thru some rough times with this Dragon and what it does to my man.

God Bless You and your Family,
( and remember it's the Tx... not him doing this)

Joyce1

[willy]

Justme+myguy:  I don't know if your husband is in for 24 or 48 months of TX.  At least your parents have accustomed to living with your husband and know him for how he is before TX.  You may need to get them educated about the many possible side effects of treatment.  You may read a lot about "riba rage", but there is no promise that you will experience it.  Think of it like you do most news stories; you only hear about the bad stuff; the tragedies.  You never hear about the many that complete TX with few side effects and no problems.  It is usually the heavy sides that get noticed.  You will never know till he starts TX, but I would not go in with the expectation of a guarentee of riba rage.

I would encourage you to do more reading on treatment and to get your hubby to do the same.  If either of you have questions we are here for you, and of course, there are other boards and sites as well.  Please also keep in mind that your husband has had very little time to adjust to the notion of having this potentially life threatening and changing disease, and little time to adjust to the idea of what could be a year on treatment.  He is bound to be stressed (who wouldn't), and so it would not be unusual for some kinds of reactions from the treatment or from the emotions that this must evoke.

best,
Willy

[Loretta]

Near the end of my husbands treatment, he and I felt it was nessasary to end his tx prematurely.   Completely due to what I have learned is from the, "riba-rage."  And most importantly...NO support from others going through what we were for the entire time.  He was on the tx for 8 extremely long months.  
We have a son who is 8 yrs old and he got scared of his Dad near the end of the tx.  
Although we have a large extended family and very supportive church family, it was hard for them to understand what we were going through.

Last week we found out that after his current bloodwork, the virus is back.  Now we are considering more treatment...although not alone!  We  now realize that we need to go into this with our eyes open.  The first thing we are going to do is that before we go to see the doctor again we are going to make sure that a release is signed for me to openly discuss his treatment with his doctor.  This way the lines of comunication will be open.
I just pray that you and your husband will try and get some support.  Through counseling together or separately.  

[Lisa]

Thanks for listening guys.  It helped to get some other perspectives.  We have started family counseling and I found a hep C "sponsor" whose hsb went thru similar problems during tx and is now virus free so I have some hope.  Just for today, I am ok.  I'll deal with tomorrow when it comes.

[willy]

This has been bouncing around in this forum for a while.  It will help you better understand your loved one and the effects of TX.  It is placed in our library now, very easy to find, refer others to, and to re read.

I hope that it helps you.

Best,
Willy

http://www.hepcsurvivalguide.org/comboguide.htm

The same link in our library.....

http://www.hcvanonymous.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?board=TandM;action=display;num=1106870576

[misty]

hi all,
perhaps you remember me, i did a few posts on social security, as i retired from that agency.

anyhow, my husband completed 48 weeks of treatment at the end of november, and will go for his 3 mos pcr later this month.

i would not have survived his treatment, if not for this site, nobody could possibly understand this treatment and the effect it has not only on the person doing the treatment, but everyone they come in contact with.  

my husband was a physically fit, healthy firefighter/paramedic when he was diagnosed and started treatment. he got every side effect possible and was off work the entire time. the rage hit at about the 5 month mark, and boy did it hit hard. for the rest of the treatment, i lived with a suitcase packed and in the car, ready to leave at a moments notice. and i did leave....i left many times. it was not that i was afraid of him, as he would never physcially hurt me, but the rage became more than i could handle.  thank god i have an understanding family. i would stay at  my brothers for a few days, i went to our condo in florida a couple of times, and even drove 700 miles with our dog, to my sons house in virginia.  at one point i thought the only solution was divorce....i did not want him to stop treatment....i wanted him to save his life even if it cost our marriage... this was not the man i married almost 25 years ago, but i knew that man was still in there, somewhere.  

i knew this rage was a side effect of the treatment, and was hoping it would stop as soon as treatment was over.  and it did....well not the next day, but its been almost 3 mos now and things are slowly getting back to normal.

my husband is back to work now. his appitite has improved, and has gained almost 20 lbs back. the hair that  had fallen out is slowly returning, and we swear he's getting hair where he hasn't had any in many years, lol.

for all the spouses, partners, and caregivers, i can only wish you the best, its a long, hard, trying treatment....but the person you knew is still there, buried deep beneath side effects.  they will return, and when they do, life will take on a different meaning...

my best to all
misty

[willy]

Misty:  I'm glad that this forum helped you.  You have always been very helpful to people that have had SS questions here.  I know that you have helped people, and so I'm really very happy that we could do something for you too.

I'm sorry that this has been a tough year for you..... but it sounds as is you (and your husband) survived it.  Good luck of the recovery ahead of you both,

Best,
Willy