I WAS NOT READY FOR THIS

It was raining hard when I pushed open that door
and stepped out onto the sidewalk.
The sun was shining brightly when I first got there.
Sandals, jeans and a t-shirt was all I was wearing
as I pulled up, with the top down, and parked
across the street.

I just stood there, my back up against the wall,
Trying to keep out of the rain, but I could not.
I was getting lost in it.

Everything looked different, the sky, the trees,
the street and sidewalk that faded off into
nothingness.

The air smelled different, and I felt different,
somehow.

Detached, not here, not anywhere.

As I made my way across the street, the wind
kicked up, and the rain, the rain got so bad.

I was not ready for this.
I thought I was.